The heartbreak of giving

I put my heart in a present for you, it was a story I wanted to give. It was a tale of a different world, with pictures in all the colors of the rainbow. I hoped that by showing it to you, that it would give you the courage to be different in your world.

I wanted to make it easier for you to breathe. I wanted you to see that I cared, that someone cared, that the world cares about what is different.

I carefully chose this particular book amongst a sea of other books, amongst a world of other things that I could possibly give. Clothes to keep you warm, jewelry to adorn you or money for your independent choice.

I brought it home with me. I touched it carefully. I wrapped it gently with paper in my favorite color. It was the deepest of the ocean blue and tied with a pink ribbon just for you.

I had planned it all so carefully. Just count my thoughts. The present not only contained a book, but a whole day that I spent thinking of you and wrapped up along with what was bought was hopes, dreams and wishes.

I hoped you would open it carefully. I hoped you would smile. I hoped you would read all the love I was giving to you between the lines. I forgot to hope that you would show up this time.

My gift still lies unopened. I haven’t touched it. All my wishes for you are still sealed. Bought, wrapped and given, but never received. I hope you get it, I hope you understand that all my love for you was never released. So it lives there now, between those ocean blue sheets.

So at least someone got something that day. I got stood up. I got a broken heart. I got a valuable lesson learned. You should never give your heart to someone who isn’t willing to give theirs in return.

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